I'm not going to go into detail on this blog about my dad, but if you know me, you know I have parent issues. My relationship with them is strained. I do try to talk to my dad on a monthly basis, but we aren't really close.
Holidays like Father's Day is a difficult one for me. Especially in the card department. All the cards usually say, "Oh dad, you've always been there for me." or "When I was little, you would put me on top of your shoulders." Blah, blah, blah. None of that stuff is true, so needless to say, my dad usually gets a generic Father's Day card. I try to be a good daughter, even though I'm generally the parent in our relationship, and even call him on Father's Day to wish him a good day. I try my hardest to play the part of a good daughter.
Yesterday, that was a mistake. From the moment he picked up the phone, he was just being a jerk to me. I could tell in his voice he is still annoyed at me for not giving him money when he called me in May. Whatever, I am making the choice not to enable your habits. Our phone conversation ended quickly and I hung up very irritated at him. It's Father's Day, a day we are to celebrate our dads. Instead, I was regretting the fact that I called him. Now, you might say if I knew he was going to be this way, why did you call? Well, because the next time we spoke, he would of made me feel bad by laying on the guilt trip about not calling him. Even though, in my eyes, he's hardly deserving of any praise about being a father. He still expects a phone call on this day.
Kristine reminded me that even though he was hurtful, I was the bigger person by still calling him and that is all that mattered. I spent a good portion of my morning annoyed at my dad because he managed to dampen Father's Day.
But as I left the house, my attitude started to go away. I can't change my father, and I just have to try to love him as much as I can. Even though, he makes it extremely difficult all the time. I still wish for a perfect dad, a perfect mother. But, I realize that God had a plan and ultimately I was so much better off with my grandparents than I would of been with my mom and dad. I realize no parents are perfect, but mine are a little more flawed than most.
Anyways, I spent the rest of the day watching a kid I know get baptized. Julie treated me to a lovely lunch at Texas Roadhouse, and my afternoon/evening was spent hanging with the Kambergs. So, even though I had a bad start to the morning, the day ended perfect! I hope everyone had a fantastic Father's Day.
Hey, guess who is moving soon?!?!? *Stands up and waves* Yes, that would be me. I'm so ready and it's so time. I might have to employ a few men to help me move my bed. It's the only thing I need help with and I very well could be moving this weekend. Oh joy.