Monday, August 24, 2009

Where does your loyalty stand?

I've always been a sports fan. I remember growing up and always watching sports. I mostly watched basketball and college football. But as I got older, my interest in sports kinda faded until the past couple of years. Someone re-ignited my passion for sports and I started following teams again. I started following baseball in the beginning for the sole reason that a boy I liked was a loyal Yankees fan. But after quite some time of watching the games, something started happening. I started getting involved in the games, started checking the website, started rooting for the Yankees. And I don't care what you say, how much you hate them, I'm a fan. Every year my allegiance grows stronger for them.

There is one team I have been faithful to for many years now. That would be my Notre Dame Fighting Irish. When football season comes around, I become a maniac. I will catch as many games that I can and will absolutely scream my lungs out cheering for my team. I love my Irish. Even though the team hasn't been the best since Lou Holtz retired. I still follow them, my loyalty is to them.

This weekend in church, we had a sermon on loyalty. The pastor talked about loyalty to sports, your job, relationships, etc. He stated that loyalty is simply faithfulness, no matter what. Regardless of setbacks, frustrations, disappointments, you remain loyal to something. He brought up relationships, I fought back tears as I recalled friends who weren't loyal to me and was reminded of friendships where I wasn't loyal to them either.

He then asked, "Are you loyal to your church?" I loyal to my church? In some aspects, I am as loyal as they come. But in other things, I'm not so loyal to the place I call home. For reasons left unsaid, my loyalty falters in one area. It's something I refuse to give in to. That got me thinking, could I be more loyal to my church? Or the question I am asking, am I willing to be 100% loyal to my church?

He also asked, "Are you loyal to God?" Oh man, my brain was already turning, but then he said this. Am I loyal to God? Yes. Am I as loyal to God as I should be? Unfortunately, no. It's an area I need improvement in. I started thinking while I was in church, why am I more loyal to a football team or to a friendship, than I am to God? Where did my boundaries get blurred?

Cal said your loyalty is tested during times, especially bad times. During times when another job is offering you more money for a job that you won't like. During times when your spouse has been unfaithful. During times when a friend betrayed you. During times when your church is going through change. And to be loyal to to something requires something that is bigger than ourselves, someone who is greater than ourselves and to even bring on the difficult times to test our loyalty.

It has taken me days to write this blog, partly in reason, that I it has really been weighing me down in a lot of ways. The main thing I have been struggling with is what would I do when I fail Jesus? God is always faithful and will remain loyal to us. But when you actually fail Jesus, what does one do?

I know I have failed Him many times, but each time I've failed Him, He took a hold of my hand and said it would be okay and that he still loved me. There are times when I feel I've failed so badly, that I will never be forgiven. I have used up my last chance with God. But I am reminded of the grace and mercy of God. No matter how many times I screw up, how many times I lose, God's loyalty to me never fails.

Quote of the day: "Do not let loyalty and faithfulness forsake you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart."


Kristine said...

I *heart* you and your loyality to everything. You've grown SO much in the past year-ish. I am so proud of you and I know that you'll keep moving forward. God's moving in you and through you.

Emily said...